Rest in natural great peace. This exhausted mind, Beaten helplessly by karma and neurotic thoughts Like the relentless fury of the pounding waves in the infinite ocean of samsara. Rest in natural great peace!– Nyoshul Ken Rinpoche
Days 20 and 21 of 40 days of yoga! Half way! More than half way 🙂
I am going to compare this half way stage (glibly and quite possibly inaccurately) to middle age. In my youth (the first 3 weeks) I wanted to try everything out. I wanted to do something different every day, I wanted to try poses I had never tried before, I pushed myself, I was pulled this way and that by things that looked interesting and fun. This is good, and entirely appropriate.
But then reality intervenes – for me, my back hurts. First my upper back, and then my lower back.
I am filled with doubt and concern – why does my back hurt? I am doing yoga every day! Am I doing something wrong? Maybe I don’t know enough about yoga to have a home practice. Maybe it is yoga that is doing this to me…etc.
And amidst this, I am in pain. I must lie down my sacrum hurts me so much.
I lie down and think.
Calm down I say to myself. Take your own advice for a change :).
I ask myself if I have felt this kind of pain before.
Well? Can yoga have caused it then?
It may have aggravated it.
True. What are you going to do?
Hmmm. Go and find a sequence especially for the lower back?
So, this morning, I found this. And did it.
Guess what? Back pain much better thank you very much :).
I did it again tonight in combination with this sweetness, accompanied by my little yoga fairy, who has found the yoga book for children I used to use when I was a little girl. Off she goes, doing the poses one by one – salute to the sun, downward dog, standing forward bend, cobra, triangle pose, bow, caterpillar – and some more of her very own invention. Chattering all the while of course :). Next time I’ll take a picture I promise.
So I am thinking to myself – I need to slow down a bit, go back to basics. Do yoga for me and my body and my spirit. Stay with a sequence for a while. Get to know it. It’s not as if I am only going to be practicing yoga for 40 days you know! I have the rest of my life to play with. And right now, my body needs for me get focused on what is best for it.
Simple, Specific, Appropriate. Got it? Good.
The Bear calls me ‘Buddha’ sometimes in terms of deep sarcasm – in reference to my desire to be enlightened and completely zen – and also in reference to my frequent failures.
I know I am flawed. I am very impatient and stubborn, for starters.
Example: I have been working on a Media Law subject in my Media and Communications course for what seems like months but what is probably just weeks. I decided today that I was not going to do any more reading or exercises, I was just going to leap right into the assessment. I read it and it looked reasonable – I had to do a legal case study. I found a recent one that hadn’t gone to court yet but had all the information. I wasn’t sure so I emailed my teacher and asked her if the case was appropriate. After half an hour I decided that I would start anyway. I started – and finished. And then I checked my emails. Yes, great idea; no, you can’t use it because it hasn’t gone to court. Oh no! What a terrible waste of my precious study time! Oh woe!
Too impatient, missus.
Grasshopper, that too can be fixed by yoga :). Little bit by little bit, step by step.
And so, we are half way through.
Thank you for accompanying me on my journey – every one of you helps me so much.